The Attack of the Crab

Neither give heed to fables and endless genealogies, which minister to questions, rather than godly edifying which is in faith, so do.
1 Timothy 1:4

Glen never picked a fight, he said, physically, or in Bible discussions. “I don’t need to” he once told us, “they just seem to find me.”

This was definitely the case when a woman known to us as “the Crab” visited the Oak Street Bible Shop one day. Glen was at the counter trying to pay for his order when she approached him and said she had taken his course in Revelation.

“May I be perfectly honest with you?” she asked.”Well Ma’am,” he replied, “only you know that for sure.”

“I’ve taken another class in Revelation since I saw you last. And this teacher teaches it completely different than you did. What do you say to that.”

“Well” Glen replied, “There’s an old business maxim that says, ‘Whenever two men agree all the time, one of them is unnecessary.”

The Crab ignored this. “All I’m saying is that he disagrees with you on everything you say!”

Glen was unruffled, “I guess that means I disagree with him on every point too. What do you say to that?" She glared at him, but said nothing.

“I hope you will agree with me on one thing, ma’am, the only thing that matters is, if a teacher, any teacher, agrees with the Bible. Did this teacher base his teaching of Revelation on the Book of Daniel?”

“Oh, I see, if he doesn’t agree with you, then he disagrees with the Bible!”

“No” said Glen, “but if he disagrees with Daniel, then he disagrees with the Bible, I do say that. Daniel and Revelation fit together, they agree. If your teaching takes you in a different direction than Daniel, if it is not congruent with Daniel, then you have drifted into error. You may remember that I asked everyone to take my classes on Daniel before they studied Revelation with me. I know you started, what happened?”

“Oh, I saw all those statues and weird animals you handed out, didn’t make a bit of sense to me.”

“It didn’t make any sense to Daniel either, ma’am, at first. But then God explained what it all meant, all that was needed at that time.”

“I’ve got one for you, why are there two lists of the twelve tribes in different parts of the Bible?”, she challenged him.

“Actually”, Glen said, “it’s more complicated than that. There are different lists in Genesis, Exodus, Numbers, 1 Chronicles, and Revelation.”

“So, since you’re so big on Old and New Testaments agreeing, how do you explain that?”

“I don’t even try ma’am, have no desire to even try. I only try to understand what God explains in the Bible, that’s a full-time job, believe me. Since the Bible doesn’t tell me about the different tribes he lists, I don’t even worry about it. A coach of a football team fields twelve players, but they are not always the same twelve. He can bench a player for a time. Kind of like God benched the tribe of Dan, for example. There are even two lists of disciples, if you think about it.”

“You mean with Paul, I suppose?”

“No ma’am. I am thinking about Matthias in Acts 1:26, elsewhere, the Bible speaks of Paul and the twelve.”

“You’re just full of information aren’t you?” said the Crab.

The Crab walked over to Joy, who had been taking it all in from her high stool. She looked up at her, “You know you’ve got some real cranks that come into this store, real cranks!”

“Don’t we though!” replied Joy.

Glen paid for his order and turned back to the Crab, “You know I think I’ve read about your new teacher in the Bible. I believe it’s him in 2 Timothy 3:6,7. Yes, I’m sure of it. Got to go, but it sure has been a learning experience talking with you, ma’am.”

After Glen was out the door, the Crab walked over to Gary. “Where did he say he saw my teacher in the Bible?”

Gary found the quotation and turned the Bible around on the counter for her to read:

For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with diverse lusts.
Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.
2 Timothy 3:6,7`