In all the books I have read and the movies I have I've watched I have never seen myself portrayed, except one time. That would be Larry, in "The Razor's Edge".
I never looked like Tyrone Power (I was more the Robert Redford type--kidding), but I was once in love with a woman who looked like Gene Tierney. We grew up together and when she moved away, she wrote me a letter saying she had cried herself to sleep--she loved me.
I loved her too. We could connect with just a look, like no one I have ever known. She begged me to go to college, get a good job, so we could marry. I had other ideas. I did not realize it at the time, but I would not be happy with any career on earth, until I found the truth.
It may sound noble, but it's just that nothing in the world called to me. I could not concentrate on anything except my search, even for the sake of love.
We used to ride on my motorcycle on beautiful summer nights. We shared a hammock under a big shade tree. We had our own private jokes. You know what it's like when you are in love.
I got a job as a laborer. She went to college. Her ambition was to marry a Phd, she told people. The next time I saw her she was as cold as ice. I was no longer in the picture.
I found she was an atheist and a materialist. Many years later she still is, though her brother, who became a Christian, pleaded with her. She told someone she now has "fond memories" of me. Way too late.
I just watched "The Razor's Edge"--pretty close to my biography, except Larry went to India and became a searcher for the truth, though never finding it. I stayed near where I had been born, and the Truth found me.
Poor woman. Her goal was to "marry a Ph d". There are certainly some vile, angry, and ugly Phds out there. If she is truly an atheist materialist she will find that there is not much she can take with her from Earth when she departs it.
ReplyDeleteJane, your comments are appreciated. The woman I wrote about did not marry her Phd but did acquire some wealth. Her family became a shambles, while her believing brother's family are also believers and have turned out very well.
ReplyDeleteI am sorry she did not find a way in which to repent while here on Earth and reap those rewards. Still, many of us know people just like her.
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